The Wrap - At Last

1. Parramatta. Get the wooden spoon out of your second draw at home and write their name on it. What a woeful performance, but is anyone surprised (apart from the Warriors and Cowboys who have lost to them in 2011)?

They are operating on massive salary cap unders this year and have bought terribly. I don't know about you, but I saw more positives when Daniel Anderson was coach. With fifty 'we've never trained harder' articles in the press, they are all a hoax.

Has anyone heard of a player or team who has not trained well during the week? Everyone is training well and 'didn't see it coming', even though 'we didn't turn up to play'...but in the end a loss is a loss is a loss.

They are a joke. Melbourne on fire but if 1, 7 or 9 are lost, so are their chances. That is called a salary cap.

2. Cricket. Clarke scores a ton against Bangladesh. Do we do handstands? Or do we ask why there is another worthless tournament overseas? And a quick presser from today's enthralling clash in game 2 of "the riveting, three game never-to-be repeated, must-not-miss-series. Hope: "Bangladesh captain Shakib Al Hasan won the toss and chose to bat first as Australia dropped Cameron White for Callum Ferguson for the second limited overs match at Mirpur". Finally someone has seen the light. Get rid of White. Ricky's chums are on the slide.

3. AFL. The Essendon resurgence is pretty impressive. James Hird has them firing. An old gellong coach there might be helping a touch too. Swans scored a great win in Perth. The Eagles may be back to something near formidable form. Adelaide in all clubs on the rocks.

4. Shamrocker. Great win along side Robbo's favourite horse, Black Caviar. Apparently Black Caviar tastes like horse shit.

5. Super 15. How bad is Perth going? They may go the way of the Perth Reds league team. Everything that comes out of there seems to fail....Kim Beasley, Damien Martyn, Mitchell Johnson, Perth Glory....

6. EPL. ManU will win in a canter. The rest are intimidated and cannot defeat the juggernaut.

7. Masters. Great efforts from Jason Day and Adam Scott - and Ogilvy. Day on debut was superb. Tiger formidable once more. The Greg Norman award goes to Rory McIlroy. Choked big time like the great white goldfish before him.

8. Can't wait for the Wayne Bennett announcement. He is apparently going to coach the Sydney Kings.