1. The Gold Coast Cokeheads. How widespread is this? There might be a few other clubs which are a bit nervous. And a few officials if this was going on at end of season trips!
I noticed that the former great Roosters backrower - John Tobin - has been linked to the whole sorry mess. Add Jason Smith and Matt Seers and the Criminal NRL XIII is going take some significant work to get selected in it these days.
Surely Greg Bird - that police car urinating, girlfriend bashing, coke supplier - and all round great guy (!) - needs to be ended. In the end, these blokes simply have too much cash and too few brains (they tell me Greg Bird was the dux of his school....surely not). Maybe Todd Carney wasn't that bad after all. Dave Taylor has also always been an underperformer and no wonder why.
The whole lot of them need life bans...but hang on, Joey Johns was made an Immortal. What to do? The NRL has some serious problems. Try the AFL way, cover it up until they have had four offences.
2. Criminal NRL XIII from days gone:
1. Joe Kilroy
2. Noah Nandruku
3. John Hopoate
4. Les Mara (on the run)
5. Eric Grothe Snr
6. Tricky Trindall
7. Paul Hayward (RIP)
13. Paul Mares
12. Willie Manu
11. John Elias (c)
10. Scott Wilson
9. Michael Beattie
8. Andrew Walker
Reserves.
14 - Greg Bird
15 - Julian O'Neill (for burning an effigy of a giant dolphin - last seen wearing a camel suit at Sydney airport)
16 - Roy Bell
17 – Ryan Tandy (RIP)
18 – Brad Murray
3. World Cup of Cricket. Can anyone explain why this needs to take so long. Australia has one game per week. What a joke! They could compress the thing massively and play fewer decent games mid week. Surely too there is scope for a "wet weather" day at a venue when you have that much time between games. What was at the Gabba today? The one point you receive for an abandoned game is a terrible disadvantage...especially if it is against a nuffie team.
4. Greg Inglis to Rugby Union...YAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWNNN. Honestly, this stuff needs to be ended with a swift ripping up of contracts. It brings the game into disrepute more than most things.
5. Brett Morris will be the best signing of the year. The Bulldogs will be hard to toss if he stays fit with his brother Josh.
6. Looking forward to seeing Ricky Stuart get another wooden spoon. He'll be hoping that the Gold Coast get punted in the first couple of weeks so he comes second last - not last.
7. The refereeing in the Chelsea v Burnley game was to be believed. Chelsea were ripped off something chronic.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Sunday, February 15, 2015
Wrap - World Cup Cricket Teflon Fever
1. The new TV commentary cheam is something good about the World Cup tournament. Seemingly the Fox boys of BJ, Mark Waugh (a national selector as commentator?), Flem and AB have just moved in with Slats, Tubby, Warnie and the like. But where is Ian Healy? James Brayshaw and Chappelli? All goooone! The way of the future no doubt.
2. Cannot believe the crowds to date. Even Melbourne supported it. They love beating the Poms down that way. The India v Pakistan game in Adelaide however caused major social problems. You could not get a slurpie anywhere this afternoon - or a cab.
3. Aaron Finch scored a great ton, but he better get his hands right soon or he will be the one pushed out the door. Shane - TEFLON - Watson will again escape the sack - as always. You get the feeling that the day he is punted, he will walk away from the game. It is fast approaching. Getting rid of George Bailey is not the way forward, despite what Chappelli thinks. Getting rid of Chappelli off the commentary team might remind him of the stupidity of saying such things.
3A. Great to see both Haddin and Mitchell Marsh pull a Root on Valentine's Day.
Bailey adds stability and he can play. He is calm in a crisis. What price Clarke twinging the old hammy again? $1.01.
Zimbabwe did OK v the Sth Afrekens. India are looming as a surprise packet. They need to play in the daytime if you are to beat them!
4. Steve Smith is a match winner, if not with bat then in the field. What a catch he took - complete with the exaggerated roll at the end to make it look that little bit better. The pressure to score a ton every time you go out in the middle must wear a bit thin.
5. Waratahs. This Michael Cheika dual role of coaching thing looks dodgy for mine. A bad loss, but great results for the minnows of the Force and Rebels this week.
6. John Sutton's axing as skipper. It continues to amaze me that NRL coaches can pretend they know nothing about these incidents and walk away with no responsibility - even when they knew the whole business. Think Bellamy in the salary cap scandal...Teflon again!
By the way, the Rabbits can do nothing but win these days...who would have thought? This UK jaunt seems like an injury laden trap if ever there was one. Into the cold to play worthless trials against some big aggressive mad Englishmen...why?
7. I am getting mighty sick of seeing critical Sheffield Shield fixtures go bush into silly venues where the decks are under prepared and not up to first class standard. NSW are in Wagga Wagga and have got the worst of the deck. A Joke Joke. Worse when they elected to bat on the thing. Remember all those years in Newcastle when they got whipped? Or the Junction Oval for the Vics?
2. Cannot believe the crowds to date. Even Melbourne supported it. They love beating the Poms down that way. The India v Pakistan game in Adelaide however caused major social problems. You could not get a slurpie anywhere this afternoon - or a cab.
3. Aaron Finch scored a great ton, but he better get his hands right soon or he will be the one pushed out the door. Shane - TEFLON - Watson will again escape the sack - as always. You get the feeling that the day he is punted, he will walk away from the game. It is fast approaching. Getting rid of George Bailey is not the way forward, despite what Chappelli thinks. Getting rid of Chappelli off the commentary team might remind him of the stupidity of saying such things.
3A. Great to see both Haddin and Mitchell Marsh pull a Root on Valentine's Day.
Bailey adds stability and he can play. He is calm in a crisis. What price Clarke twinging the old hammy again? $1.01.
Zimbabwe did OK v the Sth Afrekens. India are looming as a surprise packet. They need to play in the daytime if you are to beat them!
4. Steve Smith is a match winner, if not with bat then in the field. What a catch he took - complete with the exaggerated roll at the end to make it look that little bit better. The pressure to score a ton every time you go out in the middle must wear a bit thin.
5. Waratahs. This Michael Cheika dual role of coaching thing looks dodgy for mine. A bad loss, but great results for the minnows of the Force and Rebels this week.
6. John Sutton's axing as skipper. It continues to amaze me that NRL coaches can pretend they know nothing about these incidents and walk away with no responsibility - even when they knew the whole business. Think Bellamy in the salary cap scandal...Teflon again!
By the way, the Rabbits can do nothing but win these days...who would have thought? This UK jaunt seems like an injury laden trap if ever there was one. Into the cold to play worthless trials against some big aggressive mad Englishmen...why?
7. I am getting mighty sick of seeing critical Sheffield Shield fixtures go bush into silly venues where the decks are under prepared and not up to first class standard. NSW are in Wagga Wagga and have got the worst of the deck. A Joke Joke. Worse when they elected to bat on the thing. Remember all those years in Newcastle when they got whipped? Or the Junction Oval for the Vics?
Sunday, February 8, 2015
Wrap - ODI Fever
1. Looking forward to the ODI World Cup. Hundreds to Warner and Maxwell v India in a practice match. Surely a sign of things to come. We will be hard to beat, but it is amazing what a wet deck or a couple of unexpected wickets (eg. Steve Smith) can do to a team. NZ can surprise. South Africa are favourites for mine.
2. Charity Shield. I sure hope charities benefit because no one else does watching it!
3. John Sutton is strangely moved from the Souths team captaincy and now it is revealed why. He had a preseason "incident"...Souths are making a habit of these of late. Must be all the reflections off the silverware at the club, causing them to be disoriented and confused.
4. Western Sydney Wanderers play at Penrith Park and finally get a win. Could be back there very soon by the sounds of it.
5. It was pointed out during the week to me that Jeff Crowe has had more tests than his brother Martin. Jeff played very few but most as a ICC Third Match Official. On the other hand, Martin Crowe is a rent-a-quote these days, bagging the current players, especially Warner.
6. Have a good week..no footy, AFL and a tiring A-League. More required...soon!
2. Charity Shield. I sure hope charities benefit because no one else does watching it!
3. John Sutton is strangely moved from the Souths team captaincy and now it is revealed why. He had a preseason "incident"...Souths are making a habit of these of late. Must be all the reflections off the silverware at the club, causing them to be disoriented and confused.
4. Western Sydney Wanderers play at Penrith Park and finally get a win. Could be back there very soon by the sounds of it.
5. It was pointed out during the week to me that Jeff Crowe has had more tests than his brother Martin. Jeff played very few but most as a ICC Third Match Official. On the other hand, Martin Crowe is a rent-a-quote these days, bagging the current players, especially Warner.
6. Have a good week..no footy, AFL and a tiring A-League. More required...soon!
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Wrap - Retired or Sacked?
1. Asian Cup Soccer. What a superb game! Very exciting and a great win. But what....? The highest ranked team in the tournament was #50 in the world (Iran)?..then Japan (#54)...and Australia are #100...anyhow, it was great theatre and big Ange (is he getting bigger?) smiled. Take note Ray Price.
2. When will we get to a point where there are separate national coaches for the different forms of Australian cricket - Test, T20 and ODI? Justin Langer has done his chances of a big IPL contract no harm as coach after four straight BBL finals. A good effort. Brad Hogg continues to amaze.
The ODI record for Australia in recent seasons is pretty amazing. Maxwell has hit a bit of gold in the final at the WACA. Loved James Brayshaw's line when they showed some footage of Darren Lehmann on the exercise bike in the sheds..."too late".
2. Interesting to see the world's crankiest cricket coach of Queensland - Stuart Law - sacked. He says retired, we say sacked. Can James Hopes still keep playing? He needs to retire fast too. He is the cause of most friction for mine. Funny how a lot of Queenslanders have played for other BBL franchises over the years. Hauritz, Hartley, Khawaja...Ben Dunk, Cameron Boyce...
3. Brain Explosion I. Use Manaka Oval as the venue for the final. Surely the home team should have it in their home state. (However how bad was the WACA deck with the India v England game).
4. Brain Explosion II. Use Newcastle Stadium - or is it Energy Australia, Marathon, Ausgrid, Henny Penny Park? - for a major final. Interesting to see the size of the crowd at the Asian Cup Final out at ANZ/ Olympic Stadium with members not admitted on their usual paying passes. Greedy promoters deserved nothing, but collected.
5. Almost choked on the cornflakes reading that Shane Watson has now taken to yoga to relax his mind. His life is becoming very Jana Pittmanesque...studying to be a doctor, relationship failed, adopted kid, winter Olympics trials, breast enlargement...he has some catching up yet, but is well on the way. Just bat and play. He apparently bought a $9Million joint at Coogee the other day. Oh the drama.
6. Noticed Tiger played his worst game of golf ever at the Phoenix Open. How massive are the crowds there? They know how to put on a show. Have you seen Tiger's deliberate shot into the grandstand at the 16th circus hole? I think he knew it was going to mud.
7. I know I doubted it from the get go, but Robert Allenby should just shut up now. How to bring the game and himself into disrepute! We know for sure he was not kidnapped because the whinging wouldn't have allowed anyone to put up with him, even in the boot. He has had a shocker. His mismanagement of the media has been mind blowing. Badly advised.
8. Djokovic. A superb robotic tennis player. Again, while we marvel at their talents, there is a decided lack of warmth for tennis players on the world stage of spectator affection. The posturing, the foul mouthing, the dummy spits, the locker room tantrums...world crowds like to see someone fight and triumph, struggle and put their body on the line...Bring back the traditional players. Djokovic may well be the closest we have seen to this. Murray is a brat. What about the girlfriend's abuse...they simply can't last as a pair. You heard it here.
Did anyone notice how fat Boris Becker has become? He looks like a Mad Max movie extra.
Serena. The world's best ever. And to think Stosur beat her in a Grand Slam Final. One for Sam to tell the grandkids.
9. NFL. I think everyone is hoping that clown from the Seattle Seahawks who fronted the media like some sort of deadbeat - "You know why I am here" - gets smashed badly by the New England Patriots. I read with interest that the defensive players in the Seahawks have been tackling like league/ rugby players to get their defence better.
10. Auckland Nines. Like eating food at the candy bar of the local cinema. Tastes OK, no one remembers it and you can feel crook afterwards. Souths have back to back premierships now.
2. When will we get to a point where there are separate national coaches for the different forms of Australian cricket - Test, T20 and ODI? Justin Langer has done his chances of a big IPL contract no harm as coach after four straight BBL finals. A good effort. Brad Hogg continues to amaze.
The ODI record for Australia in recent seasons is pretty amazing. Maxwell has hit a bit of gold in the final at the WACA. Loved James Brayshaw's line when they showed some footage of Darren Lehmann on the exercise bike in the sheds..."too late".
2. Interesting to see the world's crankiest cricket coach of Queensland - Stuart Law - sacked. He says retired, we say sacked. Can James Hopes still keep playing? He needs to retire fast too. He is the cause of most friction for mine. Funny how a lot of Queenslanders have played for other BBL franchises over the years. Hauritz, Hartley, Khawaja...Ben Dunk, Cameron Boyce...
3. Brain Explosion I. Use Manaka Oval as the venue for the final. Surely the home team should have it in their home state. (However how bad was the WACA deck with the India v England game).
4. Brain Explosion II. Use Newcastle Stadium - or is it Energy Australia, Marathon, Ausgrid, Henny Penny Park? - for a major final. Interesting to see the size of the crowd at the Asian Cup Final out at ANZ/ Olympic Stadium with members not admitted on their usual paying passes. Greedy promoters deserved nothing, but collected.
5. Almost choked on the cornflakes reading that Shane Watson has now taken to yoga to relax his mind. His life is becoming very Jana Pittmanesque...studying to be a doctor, relationship failed, adopted kid, winter Olympics trials, breast enlargement...he has some catching up yet, but is well on the way. Just bat and play. He apparently bought a $9Million joint at Coogee the other day. Oh the drama.
6. Noticed Tiger played his worst game of golf ever at the Phoenix Open. How massive are the crowds there? They know how to put on a show. Have you seen Tiger's deliberate shot into the grandstand at the 16th circus hole? I think he knew it was going to mud.
7. I know I doubted it from the get go, but Robert Allenby should just shut up now. How to bring the game and himself into disrepute! We know for sure he was not kidnapped because the whinging wouldn't have allowed anyone to put up with him, even in the boot. He has had a shocker. His mismanagement of the media has been mind blowing. Badly advised.
8. Djokovic. A superb robotic tennis player. Again, while we marvel at their talents, there is a decided lack of warmth for tennis players on the world stage of spectator affection. The posturing, the foul mouthing, the dummy spits, the locker room tantrums...world crowds like to see someone fight and triumph, struggle and put their body on the line...Bring back the traditional players. Djokovic may well be the closest we have seen to this. Murray is a brat. What about the girlfriend's abuse...they simply can't last as a pair. You heard it here.
Did anyone notice how fat Boris Becker has become? He looks like a Mad Max movie extra.
Serena. The world's best ever. And to think Stosur beat her in a Grand Slam Final. One for Sam to tell the grandkids.
9. NFL. I think everyone is hoping that clown from the Seattle Seahawks who fronted the media like some sort of deadbeat - "You know why I am here" - gets smashed badly by the New England Patriots. I read with interest that the defensive players in the Seahawks have been tackling like league/ rugby players to get their defence better.
10. Auckland Nines. Like eating food at the candy bar of the local cinema. Tastes OK, no one remembers it and you can feel crook afterwards. Souths have back to back premierships now.
Monday, January 26, 2015
Wrap - Queues and Passengers
1.
The Kygrios train keeps moving. Thankfully passengers have pulled their
collective heads in a bit. However, outside of Federer and Nadal, do we really
care too much for tennis players? Is there any great affection?
2.
Big Bash League. The Sydney Sixers are a powerful franchise. They win when the
odds are stacked against them...and regularly. Josh Lalor's effort to go for 23
off the last over was possibly the worst performance by a fast bowler in
Australian short form cricket - EVER!
3.
The Asian Cup. Great of the Cahilleroos to beat China. We might be up to 90 in
the world now! The thought of scheduling a semi final at Newcastle defies all
logic. Maybe part of the Tinkler settlement.
4.
Auckland Nines. Are we getting to a point where you just don't play trials at
all - especially with your top players? Talk of Sydney wanting it. No, keep it
away.
5.
Had to laugh about the plan to have Great Britain join the NRL. How stupid!
Travel there midweek and prepare? Surely not. We can't even get them to travel
from Perth - or Penrith! Imagine the shennanigans on the plane.
6.
NRL. Just an idea, but could a team from Long Bay Gaol join the NRL? Guaranteed
crowds, high security, no queues and plenty of players. Home games only.
7.
FA Cup. What a great competition. Always upsets and it keeps the sport alive in
the country. Captivating and embarrassing for Chelsea and Man City.
8.
Noticed a QLD Reds player belted Quayde Cooper at training and injured him.
Could have been money on that - and a queue.
Monday, January 19, 2015
Wrap - Thunder Chunder
1. Another BBL season and another disastrous one for the Sydney Thunder. They can shoot themselves in the foot like no other franchise. Excuses tend to dominate - lost Khawaja and Patterson to injury before the start of the season, Hussey as well...Sandhu, Cummins to international duty. If you saw McDonald's pathetic dismissal v Stars you will definitely agree he needs the axe and quickly.
However a special vote of criticism needs to go to the management who continue to produce pathetic pitches. The pitch in Spotless Stadium was woeful - and diabolical at best. How they can present this as good enough is beyond me. The Thunder management should sack the ground crew with McDonald. They are costing them victory - and costing them crowd numbers...
If you look at the Scorchers and the Heat, the crowds know there will be a good deck and plenty of runs. Drop in pitches are pathetic - as evidenced by the MCG pitch this year. Get back to basics.
2. Nick Kyrgios. Are you Seyrgious? For all his promise, this bloke is quickly heading down Tomic Avenue. He needs to walk in a bit closer and hear this. You are becoming a caricature of all that is wrong with tennis. The haircuts, the suits, the injuries...the scandals (soon). We are over tennis brats, big time. Pull your head in and play tennis and don't become a self centred brat who loves himself to death...mystery viruses and pulling out of tournaments. Open your eyes and get your hangers on to get their noses out of the trough too. Wake up.
3. Asian Cup. Why is it that Ange Postocoglou has that dopey look of loser about him so often? Two bright wins (4-0 each) and then back to the usual blame and mumbling, eyes averted from the camera. I can hear knives sharpening. Some of those crowd numbers have been spectacular.
4. Interesting to see Shane Watson hit another 40. Starc has stepped up - thanks to Warnie - and is bowling fast. I must say that Maxwell is a worry. He folds under pressure too often. Meek and lame dismissals from brain snaps better be eliminated sooner rather than later or he will have a degree from the University of Cottee's by the end of the World Cup.
5. Chelsea v Man City is hotting up in the race for the best team...hard work at this time of year, but entertaining! How good are Southampton going? No relegation, but maybe even Champions League! The back end of the season will be a test for them.
6. Some awesome power hitting in the ODI series in South Africa. AB De Villiers a ton off 31 balls. Incredible. The bowling from the Windies however was simply awful! The ground is a joke too. But, it is a good wicket. Chris Gayle has been awesome too.
7. The biggest choke in world golf happened last night too, when Martin Kaymer blew a ten stroke lead in Abu Dhabi Golf Championship. When France’s world No. 357 Gary Stal can win an event like this, you marvel at the talent of these blokes at the top end. None are members at Parramatta Golf Course..
8. Robert Allenby. Talk about a big night out. Chucked out of the boot of a car? Kidnapped? Found by a homeless woman? Terrible if true, but I suspect there is more to the story. Sounds like he was mouthing off and got pinned. Dave Warner better watch out.
However a special vote of criticism needs to go to the management who continue to produce pathetic pitches. The pitch in Spotless Stadium was woeful - and diabolical at best. How they can present this as good enough is beyond me. The Thunder management should sack the ground crew with McDonald. They are costing them victory - and costing them crowd numbers...
If you look at the Scorchers and the Heat, the crowds know there will be a good deck and plenty of runs. Drop in pitches are pathetic - as evidenced by the MCG pitch this year. Get back to basics.
2. Nick Kyrgios. Are you Seyrgious? For all his promise, this bloke is quickly heading down Tomic Avenue. He needs to walk in a bit closer and hear this. You are becoming a caricature of all that is wrong with tennis. The haircuts, the suits, the injuries...the scandals (soon). We are over tennis brats, big time. Pull your head in and play tennis and don't become a self centred brat who loves himself to death...mystery viruses and pulling out of tournaments. Open your eyes and get your hangers on to get their noses out of the trough too. Wake up.
3. Asian Cup. Why is it that Ange Postocoglou has that dopey look of loser about him so often? Two bright wins (4-0 each) and then back to the usual blame and mumbling, eyes averted from the camera. I can hear knives sharpening. Some of those crowd numbers have been spectacular.
4. Interesting to see Shane Watson hit another 40. Starc has stepped up - thanks to Warnie - and is bowling fast. I must say that Maxwell is a worry. He folds under pressure too often. Meek and lame dismissals from brain snaps better be eliminated sooner rather than later or he will have a degree from the University of Cottee's by the end of the World Cup.
5. Chelsea v Man City is hotting up in the race for the best team...hard work at this time of year, but entertaining! How good are Southampton going? No relegation, but maybe even Champions League! The back end of the season will be a test for them.
6. Some awesome power hitting in the ODI series in South Africa. AB De Villiers a ton off 31 balls. Incredible. The bowling from the Windies however was simply awful! The ground is a joke too. But, it is a good wicket. Chris Gayle has been awesome too.
7. The biggest choke in world golf happened last night too, when Martin Kaymer blew a ten stroke lead in Abu Dhabi Golf Championship. When France’s world No. 357 Gary Stal can win an event like this, you marvel at the talent of these blokes at the top end. None are members at Parramatta Golf Course..
8. Robert Allenby. Talk about a big night out. Chucked out of the boot of a car? Kidnapped? Found by a homeless woman? Terrible if true, but I suspect there is more to the story. Sounds like he was mouthing off and got pinned. Dave Warner better watch out.
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Wrap - One Handed Off Spidercam
1. In the absence of the Twelfth Man, Billy Birmingham who must be plaiting his hair this summer - or counting his cash - I present some key Indian cricketers of the summer:
The Indian Grandmother - Kumar
The Travel Agent - Sick of Darwin
The Car Cleaner - Mohammed Shami
Two Snake Sharmas - Ishant and Rohit
The Weatherman - Raina (quack)
The Ford - VJ
The V-Rat - Kohli.
and of course, Poo Jar whose sudden omission for the fourth test in Sydney had a bad smell about it.
2. Spidercam fiasco was a joke. At the time, Steve Smith, for all the good he has done this summer (and plenty of it), was struggling to get there and simply made up an excuse. He dropped another sitter at the other end off Kohli soon after, maybe the shadow was in his eyes there too.
3. Can someone tell me why Australia is always seemingly solely responsible for setting up each Test match for a result? This Indian team showed their traditional lack of interest in winning all through the test. At times this rated as one of the most boring tests on record. Tom Parker needs to visit the hall of mirrors. The media need to start serving it up to India and put them to the test. We again are genuflecting at the altar of their arrogance.
4. Apart from Johnson's little holiday camp from this test, Ishant Sharma also was reported to have had a neck injury - from the weight of his long hair.
5. Helmets. Am I the only one who cannot believe the inaction from Cricket Australia and the manufacturers around a new design for a helmet that will not have more players killed? We can send men to the moon but helmets still cannot be fixed. Hard to believe. Make the new design, call it mandatory and move on. Baseball helmets work a treat. Get it right and soon. Basic.
6. The highlight of the test in Sydney was the picture of Bob Hawke on the big screen sinking a beer at the cricket - at about 10.30am. My son asked me who that was and I said that is one of Australia's great Prime Ministers. He laughed and thought I was joking. Check out Hawkey's (less than a minute)magnificent previous SCG cricket form: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5mBShX9fdU
7. SCG Greencoat Stupidity I. I have stumbled across two magnificent pieces of modern day SCG stupidity. Bureaucracy gone bad. There are no cubicle dunnies in the new stand on the whole of level one and two! Can you believe this? No crappers. Must be a modern thing.
8. SCG Greencoat Stupidity II. There I was thinking that knocking out five hundred seats was a Stadium Australia thing to fudge the crowd numbers...I am officially wrong. What we have now is an extension on the farce of sightscreens. Typically we get the advertisement stuck at each major ground...or the thing won't move...common light relief. Now we get sight screen zones where spectators spanning many many rows are not allowed to move - EVEN when the batsman is facing the other way. JOKE! There are actually officials who police this through the day. Talk about absurd. Dopey bastards.
The Indian Grandmother - Kumar
The Travel Agent - Sick of Darwin
The Car Cleaner - Mohammed Shami
Two Snake Sharmas - Ishant and Rohit
The Weatherman - Raina (quack)
The Ford - VJ
The V-Rat - Kohli.
and of course, Poo Jar whose sudden omission for the fourth test in Sydney had a bad smell about it.
2. Spidercam fiasco was a joke. At the time, Steve Smith, for all the good he has done this summer (and plenty of it), was struggling to get there and simply made up an excuse. He dropped another sitter at the other end off Kohli soon after, maybe the shadow was in his eyes there too.
3. Can someone tell me why Australia is always seemingly solely responsible for setting up each Test match for a result? This Indian team showed their traditional lack of interest in winning all through the test. At times this rated as one of the most boring tests on record. Tom Parker needs to visit the hall of mirrors. The media need to start serving it up to India and put them to the test. We again are genuflecting at the altar of their arrogance.
4. Apart from Johnson's little holiday camp from this test, Ishant Sharma also was reported to have had a neck injury - from the weight of his long hair.
5. Helmets. Am I the only one who cannot believe the inaction from Cricket Australia and the manufacturers around a new design for a helmet that will not have more players killed? We can send men to the moon but helmets still cannot be fixed. Hard to believe. Make the new design, call it mandatory and move on. Baseball helmets work a treat. Get it right and soon. Basic.
6. The highlight of the test in Sydney was the picture of Bob Hawke on the big screen sinking a beer at the cricket - at about 10.30am. My son asked me who that was and I said that is one of Australia's great Prime Ministers. He laughed and thought I was joking. Check out Hawkey's (less than a minute)magnificent previous SCG cricket form: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5mBShX9fdU
7. SCG Greencoat Stupidity I. I have stumbled across two magnificent pieces of modern day SCG stupidity. Bureaucracy gone bad. There are no cubicle dunnies in the new stand on the whole of level one and two! Can you believe this? No crappers. Must be a modern thing.
8. SCG Greencoat Stupidity II. There I was thinking that knocking out five hundred seats was a Stadium Australia thing to fudge the crowd numbers...I am officially wrong. What we have now is an extension on the farce of sightscreens. Typically we get the advertisement stuck at each major ground...or the thing won't move...common light relief. Now we get sight screen zones where spectators spanning many many rows are not allowed to move - EVEN when the batsman is facing the other way. JOKE! There are actually officials who police this through the day. Talk about absurd. Dopey bastards.
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