Wrap - Spoons - The Teak, the Maple, The Mahogany, The Pine, The Cedar...

1. You heard it here first. After this weekend, it is clear that Newcastle will not get the spoon. They have spirit, if not points. The Tigers? Nup...The Titans? They have too much fight. It is also clear that Parramatta will now go close to spoon winners this year again. They have no answers. Not a young bloke in the District who is better than Takiarangi at five eight? Please. Not an offload or an ounce of creativity amongst the bone brained forwards? No goalkicker?

It looks like Brad Arthur may have finally read The Wrap. He was quick to move his 'rock solid' five eight Gutherson to avoid Foran. Sadly it did nothing. He has even signed Mitchell Moses after looking closely at Jack Bird. Brad Arthur is a big part of the problem. He trims a goalkicking fullback who goes to the Roosters, does not get a goalkicker (tries to cover it by sounding out Kyle Feldt) then admits his Gutherson experiment is an abject failure by seeking all sort of replacements in Round 4! Is this the same bloke who could not get the Eels to the semis two years ago when they needed one win from their last three games? 

Parramatta have a fine array of recent 'woodware' - The Teak, the Maple, The Mahogany, The Pine, The Cedar...it is a disgrace. Cronk...arrives from The Storm but Parra sign Mitchell Moses? And their halves combination is fine? Gimme a break.

Conversely, Cronulla played amazingly well to toss the Storm. Brilliant stuff. Saints were a stand out too. Really like that McInnes as hooker. 

2. Pickle juice. Is this the greatest hoax in the NRL since the Powerbalance wrist band? We may need to ask Benji Marshall.

3. Anthony Griffin? Not sure of the success of the dramatic disciplinary move pre game. Micky Arthur may have a view on that! When you lose, it looks like a coach who has lost the plot and over reacted. He seems as though he has not learned much from being punted by the Broncos. He strikes me as too arrogant for that part of Sydney.

4. Waratahs. Perrenial losers. Have we hit rock bottom yet? Is this the best our state can produce...? Surely this is an utter embarrassment. Australian rugby is unhealthy despite the rhetoric. We may well never win another Bledisloe in our lifetime! NSW may be the franchise sold down the river from that other bastion of world sport incompetence and mismanagement - SANZAR. Get rid of the Japansese Jokers and the Argentina Alligators for starters.

5. The Swans at 0-3 are in a deep hole. The low hand ball was smothered easily and there was some really bad hands...even if it was a little greasy. Sam Reid was terrible for a forward. Swans taking contested marks are non-existent. Hayward looks great, but still not enough pace in the ranks for mine. I watched the Swans Reserves in the NEAFL on Saturday too. (The great Luke Robbo was playing). Unfortunately in that squad, there is not much pace there either. They need a player purge.

A few key upsets this weekend...Hawks down again, Gold Coast Suns win (yes, not a misprint) and the Western Bulldogs going down to Freo. The comp has started against all expectations. Eade and Buckley (Pies) look like world beaters this week!

6. Far from hailing the great Nick Kygrios for his Davis Cup efforts (how could we ever bring ourselves to this?), Kygrios and Jordan Thompson did remarkably well. He is a supreme talent but an unpredictable deadbeat too. A great effort to get through into the semis of the competition. Real tough from here, but Hewitt is the man to achieve greatness for us, if it can happen.

7. The Masters. How good is golf? The showdown between Rose and Garcia - and who knows...maybe Scott, will be intriguing. The traffic is always a bit thinner on the Monday morning of the Masters finishing. The tension and the size of the galleries is always outstanding! It never disappoints. Somehow I think the green jacket will be more prized than the Arnold Palmer winner who gets a red cardigan!

8. Noticed the Aussies have been doing well in the first week of the IPL. Smith 90+, Lynn 90+ and Maxwell a typical blinding aggressive innings. How is this thing funded? No one watches it out here.

Is Steve O'Keefe getting ahead of himself a bit...slagging off at other cricketers? And women cricketers...please.  He sounds like a prize tool. 

9. EPL. Chelsea are home, but ManU continue to stutter. Jose could yet be hosed away! Tottenham have had a great year!

10. The A League is the longest running sideshow in the joint. 55 round games wears a bit thin eventually. Then the semis hit and it is all over in a second. The prized "dunny seat" trophy is then at rest.