Wrap - Marshes and Swamps

1. Kohli. He behaved like a spoilt rich kid whose shit does not stink. His behaviour on the field was appalling. His run of outs has been exhilarating. Can't believe Starc is injured yet again. Pleased he played in the useless NZ ODI series....Cummins coming in could be useful, but he is hittable! Has an injury been better timed than Mitchell Marsh's latest one? The Marsh brothers have a high injury prone: resilience ratio. Often when form fades. 

However what has not been analysed is how soft our batting was - Wade has not done enough. If he's in the team for his "spirit" we are in trouble.

2. Cronulla looked sharp. They are definitely going to shake the comp. Gus Gould made a goose of himself suggesting they Segeyaro will be a great addition although their young hooker looked tremendous. The Storm is still dominant.

3. Parramatta win again and Semi is the main man. Unfortunately his efforts are going to be undermined by the absence of a decent goal kicker. Surely Brad Arthur thought about this. His love affair with Gutherson has reached fever pitch. He offers very little in defence and his left to right pass is awful. Good haircut however.

4. Tim Simona is looking for a start at Lottoland. The stupidity of the bets are staggering. However I am not buying the confession articles in the Sunday Telegraph this weekend. He is trying to pave the way for a return, but ripping off a charity? Please. That alone should see him barred. He needs a lot of time to make amends. The spots of a leopard are hard to remove. The sadness of a gambling addict is immense.

5. Another rugby union fiasco in the last few moments of the game will continue to consign the game to the last choice of sport fans. Refs look for penalties too closely and the closer the game, the loser the look. Too much power. Too much control. Reds dudded. Crusaders swamp them again.

6. Little Lincolntown got smashed 5-0 to see Arsenal and Man City into the FA Cup. Wenger still seems to get some results. Unfortunately he seems to win the wrong cups.

7. AFL. Get into the comp please...the longest pre season in the history of sport. None of it matters.

8. Tahs will just fall in a heap in 2017. Awful. This coach worries me.

Wrap - Indian Stir

1. NRL. Saints looked very fit and aggressive. I really liked their hooker McInnes who got them moving forward quickly. They looked fit and sharp. Parramatta will want to lift to beat them next week. 'Parra 1947' were steady, but not overly impressive. I still have major concerns over Gutherson at five eight. His shoulders are going to be sore in a couple of weeks. He may be the greatest turnstile since Jason Taylor was before him. He is fit and has some ability but he is simply not strong enough. Full stop.

2. Souths are in a deep pit now Inglis is done. Throw the Knights, Warriors and Sea Eagles in there too. The Roosters looked good. The Tigers were exciting too and the Storm are just phenomenal. Their record is so good and the last ten years of NRL have been totally dominated by them. The losers? Raiders and Sharks will feature in the semis.

3. Cricket. This Renshaw is a cool cat. He can be hard to crack and has shown amazing steel in his short career. The conditions in India are tough - and in fact - some would say deliberately manipulative for their own purposes. Facing an opposing team that has focus and talent can trouble this tactic. However as we all know, it can all fall apart in a single session.

The problem we faced was slow scoring in pursuit of a total because it slowly got India back into the game. The Australian tenacity was exceptional however.

4. How do Indians learn to appeal for everything? B9s in India must be some sort of sight.

It is the only country where a single is cheered like a six.

The need to practice their DRS calls...they came kicking and screaming into the 21st Century and now have been levelled by the DRS - and their incompetent judgement. Kohli's temperament is being found out. His on field demeanour at times is terrible.

5. Shaun Marsh has stood up under immense pressure. A fifty on this pitch is like a ton. First innings runs are even better. Mitchell Marsh has again struggled with a terrible mully grubber underlining how cruel the game can be. He seems to find it.

Wade has been handy as keeper, but needs runs. A solid 30 or 40 would put critics to sleep...for the time being.

6. A-League. Looking a lot like the "B League" when it gets wet.

7. Leicester. Interesting that when a coach is dumped, players' poor performance is exposed - and voila...their performance improves. They are on the line and have been really poor in their collective treatment of old man Ranieri.

8. Waratahs and Rebels. Exposing our defensive problems big time. Huge losses really.

9. Phil Gould's comments about the Sharks and their "soft" premiership win are out of line. Gus must be ready to retire. He can join Warren Ryan.

Wrap - SOK It To Them

1. Cricket. Steve O'Keefe was surprisingly stunning. His 12 wickets for not much was a shock, but the best thing about it was his steel. He fought hard and executed brilliantly. Lyon chipped in with his famous number 6-11 dismissals and joined the great Andy Caddick on 234 wickets.

Success in India equates to massive pay days. How long has it been since we've had a left arm bowler who actually gets wickets...Ray Bright, Tom Hogan, Murray Bennett, AB, Clarke, Bevan, Katich, Hogg, Xavier Doherty... and Bevan or Katich were the pick of this lot!

The Smith ton was exceptional and the contributions from Starc invaluable. Shaun Marsh has to go. He is inconsistent and tolerates a loss. He lacks steel. Is Khawaja too lumbering on his feet to survive?

Make no mistake...India will be back. Kohli rarely if ever gets less than 10 runs in two Test innings. The other thing is that their pitches get results. Very few draws in India.

2. NRL. A week away and there are still major doubts over a few teams: Newcastle, Tigers, Manly, Parramatta, Souths, Bulldogs, Warriors, Titans will all struggle to make the eight. I am also worried about the Broncos and Roosters. Cronulla without Ennis may be a different team, but they have recruited well - especially if they can jag Segeyaro.

3. Soccer. Chelsea are home in the EPL. Powering down the straight.

Locally, Sydney FC have dominated, but I am concerned that Melbourne Victory own the best grit and grind when it matters most. How ridiculous is that Western Sydney Wanderers crowd banner fiasco? The ground security should have rounded the perpetrators up and turfed them and Popovic should have gotten on the front foot to address it all. Normal poor sports management.

4. Rugby. The Waratahs are deadly boring. This is going to be a slow burn in 2016.

5. Ireland and England in the Five Nations (Italy don't count). Will be a tight finish. One of the great world sporting competitions...and a surprising number of tries these days.

6. A big week ahead for Leicester...they got rid of the coach midweek and may be down the tube without a couple of wins in this next fortnight. Hope you got on at $100 plus at the start of the season for a Leicester relegation post winning the thing.

7. Are the NRL kidding? They allow Brookvale Oval to be called "Lottoland" and cash in on Sportsbet then worry why players are betting on games. The NRL is not blessed with intelligent blokes...

8. After a year of the underdog last year, we are looming as a year of favourites winning...Federer, Chelsea, South African cricket...

Wrap - Likeable Flare Throwing, Shirts off Derbies

1. The world's busiest - and safest - job is the NRL Integrity Commission. There is no shortage of work. They are like school prefects with badges and little else. The dobbers come from near and far all year round - cyberbullies, dog photos, gambling, fights in pubs and clubs, DV accusations, drink driving...phew...a busy off season.

Their lack of grunt with idiots (although I do note Todd Carney seems to have been black banned) is staggering. This Foran text message caper is outrageous. He dudded Parramatta (who doesn't?) and suddenly is fully recovered...crisp and clean...good to go. They need to re-open the Foran matter and deal fully with it.

If they don't we may have to endure another Eddie Hayson press conference.

2. Fresh from playing cricket with items of outdoor furniture in Dubai, our cricketers are good to go. Shaun Marsh gets the customary ton before the Test and is now in the team and will again fall in a heap like his brother Mitchell. Poor old Geoff Marsh. Tough as teak, heart and soul of the team and his lads squander opportunity after opportunity.

I noted one key fact this weekend. Dave Warner has only ever batted a full day once...not a problem of course when you score as quickly as him, but he or Smith need to rival Kohli with runs or we are done. Time in the middle with all of the batsmen will really count. No good though if they don't score.

3. Did anyone give a fat watoosi about the T20 on Friday night - or tonight? Pat Cummins I must say has been a substantial disappointment all year. Quick...but quick to the fence. Billy Stanlake is another Greg Chappell joke. Billy needs to see if he can hit the stumps in the nets first.

That commentary team needs a real overhaul. It is a tired formula. Slats is a key part of the problem although he is likeable. There was also a character in Get Smart called 'Simon the Likeable' who wooed and schmoozed people...but eventually got smacked in the face by 99's mother.

4. Love an NRL pre-season injury and coach reactions. Get rid of all of them. Play 16 rounds (one against each team). Then State of origin on saturday nights in between. It needs to become more professional. Huge contests on a home and away rotation every second season.

5. Soccer. Popovic will leave WSR - surely. However after the Sydney Flare Throwing Derby, victory, there may be life left? However he is also in charge of recruitment and has stuffed it up too often. Why are WSW fans so keen to get their shirts off - regardless of weather? Some need to join the rest of us in the gym.

6. GWS. Could be awesome this season. Too much paaace! How long will we be pedalled the Essendon loveathon? All year? No more Melbourne Demons revival stories either. They are a failed club.

7. Almost joined Twitter this week after Genie Bouchard's dating service opened.

Wrap - Shuffling The Deck Chairs

1. Are we serious? The preparation by the Australian cricket team in Dubai is nothing short of ridiculous. An outdoor deck chair sits at short leg...are we kidding? There was not a club team in India prepared to host us? We are doomed....especially when you see Kohli hitting another double ton. He is the best in the world, without a shadow of a doubt.

Talk of Ashton Agar coming into the team is dumb. The best spinner in the long form of the game at present in Australia is either Jon Holland or Sommerville. Neither are in Dubai.

2. NRL Trials. Can we start the season now and have one game against each team? Imagine the tight home and away expectations? No silly double ups....That might stop the whingers that will descend upon us around Origin time.

3. Rugby Union State of Origin. Sounds great, but is there really enough blokes playing out of their state to make it worthwhile/ interesting? Does anyone care enough? The crowds in QLD this weekend tell us - 'no'. Chiefs triumph over Crusaders was impressive!

4. Moises Henriques hits 265 in the Shield. Just in time...the team left two weeks ago.

5. Western Sydney Wanderers. They are struggling! Popovic needs to go I suspect. Take the cash!

6. ManU are charging to the end (undefeated for many weeks), but Chelsea are home. A huge challenge to the rest.

7. Is Tiger done? He will be back one day....probably in a major...

8. The Super Bowl was one hell of a game. Amazing end and reinforces that some players just know how to lift and produce under pressure.

9. Well who would have thought...Mundine wanting to fight Green again? Never would have guessed that the rogue judge would have gifted them both another $5 million each...the boxing game has lost the plot.

10. Parramatta Criminal XIII Update: Three additions in a week...

1. Jarryd Hayne (shot at in King's cross and consorting issues)
2. Semi Radrardra (DV charges). In court tomorrow! Possible 2017 ban pending.
3. Michael Jennings (niteclub fight with Police)
4. Kirisome Auva'a  (new signing from Rabbits - DV charges)
5. Vai Toutai - (glassing a bikie - retribution pending)
6. Corey Norman (drug possession, consorting warning)
7. Keiran Foran (gambling/ consorting charges)
8. Junior Paulo (consorting issues/ M4 road rage incident)
9. Reni Matiau (cocaine issues; tat issues)
10. Peni Terepo (Auckland drink driving charges)** up the charts with a bullet.
11. Kenny Edwards (DV charges; punched a fan in the head and was barred from the Gold Coast precinct)
12. Ma'ua Mau (ex clink - reformed)
13. Suaia Matagi (ex-clink - reformed)

RESERVES:
Eric Grothe Snr (molotov cocktail onto own blue Falcon car)
Paul Mares (molotov cocktail onto car - assistant)
Chris Sandow (street fighting, car crash runaway)
Tim Smith (stole coach Smith's car at Wakefield and crashed it)
Taumalina Toutai (drink driving)
Mitchell Allgood (drink driving)
Jason Smith (cocaine wholesaler)
Danny Wicks (clink - retired)

CEOs/ ADMIN:
Jason Irvine. Eels Football Manager. In court this week just gone charged with: knowingly dealing with the proceeds of crime, dishonestly obtaining property by deception, and acting with intent to pervert the course of justice

Wrap - Year of The Rooster

Some sort of weekend of sport....

1. Davis Cup. A resounding victory v Czech. You can get lucky with the draw and now Australia are entrenched in the World Group. Is it time to cut Tomic free? He can be a massive distraction to the common goal. Everyone is over his dummy spits...and his entourage.

2. Rugby. Is the 15 a side game dying? There seems to be every variation but the traditional...sevens...tens...A fair crowd at the Rugby this weekend (bigger than the Auckland Nines crowds)

3. Women's Rugby sevens and women's AFL. The crowds have been huge and the toughness of the athlete amazing. There are some big hits! Melbourne love their footy!

4. Cricket ODI. The NZ series is about nothing. Chappell-Hadlee Trophy. Well Greg Chappell has done his best to give the trophy back to them. Do World Rankings matter any? Maybe a change of international cricket rules will add meaning. Maxwell and Shaun Marsh have disappointed again. Is Maxwell the greatest "duck or a hundred man" since Graeme Wood? He will be a misery in India.

5. Auckland Nines. Gutherson has shown his attacking prowess but again been horrific with his defence v Penrith in the semi. This is his nemesis, regardless of his fan club. He needs a good haircut too. Some good signs re defence and intensity across some of the other Parra boys - Gower and Moreoa especially.

The depth of the Storm, Roosters and Panthers is awesome! The Nines on a hard deck in sunshine is very entertaining!

Is a drop ball the new knock on? This drives the fans mad. It sometimes goes backwards....

6. So Cameron White is bagged by Trevor Hohns for questioning bizarre Australian cricket selections this summer. He had plenty of examples: Ferguson, Minnie, Maddinson, Stanlake, Heazlet et al. Even Handscomb's ODI selection was not really deserved in that format.

Let's compare them:

Hohns Tests: 17 wkts for 580 in 7 tests at 34. 136 runs at 22.66.
White Tests: 5 wkts for 342 in 4 tests at 68. 149 runs at 29.22.

Hohns is right. White was twice as bad as him with the ball in tests. Neither have a great record but the addition of Greg Chappell to the selection panel has again unsettled a cricket organisation. He is divisive unfortunately, no matter how positive his playing record was!

7. A League derbies are becoming big business. The Melbourne one has really captivated the town.

8. NFL Super Bowl. Do a google search of the New England Patriots coach: Bill Belichick. A legend in the Vince Lombardi stakes. Some great quotes. Patriots to win tomorrow.

9. I told you to get on Leicester to be relegated a year after winning the title... it looks like it might just happen.

Wrap - Jehovah, Jehovah, Jehovah...

1. The Parramatta Police Incident and Jail Team. It appears as though Parramatta are continuing to put together a great team of quality blokes who make really good decisions under pressure. "Never trained harder...really excited about the new season ahead...looking sharp (cue: new signing photo in local paper)...feeling fresh....'

Most problems are occurring at night and Parramatta officials have apparently called the NRL looking for day games only. Apparently too, Tim Mannah was recently re-signed for three years mainly because he is the only sober bloke who can drive to the local Police station to bail these fools out of trouble...

1. Jarryd Hayne (shot at in King's cross and consorting issues)
2. Semi Radrardra (DV charges)
3. Michael Jennings (niteclub fight with Police)
4. Kirisome Auva'a  (new signing from Rabbits - DV charges)
5. Vai Toutai - (glassing a bikie - retribution pending)
6. Corey Norman (drug possession, consorting warning)
7. Keiran Foran (gambling/ consorting charges)
8. Junior Paulo (consorting issues/ M4 road rage incident)
9. Reni Matiau (cocaine issues; tat issues)
10. Peni Terepo (Auckland drink driving charges)** up the charts with a bullet.
11. Kenny Edwards (DV charges; punched a fan in the head and was barred from the Gold Coast precinct)
12. Ma'ua Mau (clink - reformed)
13. Danny Wicks (clink - retired)

RESERVES:
Eric Grothe Snr (molotov cocktail onto own blue Falcon car)
Paul Mares (molotov cocktail onto car - assistant)
Chris Sandow (street fighting, car crash runaway)
Tim Smith (stole coach Smith's car at Wakefield and crashed it)
Taumalina Toutai (drink driving)
Mitchell Allgood (drink driving)
Jason Smith (cocaine wholesaler)

CEOs/ ADMIN:
Take your pick.

What about the 2017 leadership group announced in the off season by Coach Arthur: Beau Scott, Tim Mannah as co-captains as well as Corey Norman, Frank Pritchard, Issac De Gois, Tepai Meroa, Manu Ma’u and Michael Jennings. You'd be feeling unlucky if you missed out. More chiefs than indians and three from the above team of reckless clowns. A long, long season ahead.

2. The Big Bash. It comes to an end, but what joy it has brought to the non-cricket loving wife. Every night (except when the ODI games are on). Not sure what the Channel 10 wardrobe folk will do with the pink-lime-blue shirts for the commentators now. The commentator rotation with the tan chinos was becoming a little predictable. Hopefully Channel 9 miss out on getting the BBL rights. It works as it is although not sure it converts us all into jungle watchers... Steve Price, gimme a break.

3. The Scorchers. Hard to toss at The Furnace! Justin Langer has done great work there. Why International Cricket teams don't sign him up as their national coach is a mystery. Such offers could accelerate Lehmann's demise. Langer has a calm ruthlessness and should coach Australia next. 

The crazy crap of Lehmann on Twitter re Geeves, Kevin Peterson...what is he thinking? Losing perspective. A common trait of those who become too self absorbed. The beginning of the end. Lose the Twitter rants and regather some form.

4. The Australian cricket selectors have lost the plot again...Sam Heazlet after an average of less than 20 and no ODI games for his state. And Behrendorf? He hasn't played at all for ages.

Since 2013 in ODIs we have had bowlers galore: Cutting, Coulter-Nile, Abbott, Sandhu, Paris, Stoinis, Richardson, Ahmed, Tremain, Agar, Zampa, Boland, Stanlake...now Behrendorf....NONE have stayed to make the grade permanently.

Have we got a problem Houston? Especially when we use BBL form for Australian selection in longer forms of the game.

5. Novelty Prize Winning Nuffies. I continue to be amazed at how poor the quality of catcher is at innings breaks and different on-field promotions. They never seem to have good hands. Sadly the alligator hands are alive and well. Have seen some disgraceful behaviour on kiss cam too...with the standard of kissing or the motioning towards other body parts...

6. Serena Williams - 23 Grand Slam titles is awesome. Power plus and ruthless attitude. She will go close at Wimbledon and the French to beating Margaret Court's record. At the presentation, poor old Hanna Mandlikova looked really over weight. Maybe Margaret Court could have presented the bling to Serena while she was there. More Jehovahs than the Life of Brian movie.

7. Champions - Men's Australian Open Tennis. As predicted last week, Federer and Rafa made it through as Djokovic and Murray bit the hard court. (Whatever happened to 'Rebound Ace' as a surface...just driveways perhaps now?). Two polite experts of their craft. To have a 17 time Grand Slam winner play a 14 time Grand Slam winner (9 French Opens) was pretty amazing.Superb standard.

8. New England Patriots under Tom Brady's expert eye are into another Super Bowl. Their record is amazing under coach Bill Belichick. What happened to "deflategate" this year...any controversies or accusations yet?

9. Liverpool have gone "Ker-Plopp" post Christmas in the EPL and FA Cup and every other cup, chalice, receptacle league. Can't win a thing! 

10. Auckland Nines. Love the concept (like the old SFS Sevens weekend). Expect injuries and problems, but if the sun comes out it will be huge. There may also be a whinging NRL coach or two - who would have thought...?