Sunday, April 28, 2013

The Wrap - Tom Blabhorse.com

1. The disgraceful front page - and back page - performance by The Daily Telegraph on Friday 26/4/13 with the death of Jon Mannah and their effort to sensationalise it all and link it to peptides defies belief. They need to be slammed and shamed. No journalist was even prepared to put their name to this pathetic piece. The family were justifiably shattered and embarrassed. The Mannahs are a deeply religious and quiet family of good people going through a lot of grief. Tim Mannah has shown a lot of ticker and composure around his brother's passing and has stood up.

I wonder whether we will get the same style of article on the recent passing of a journalist known to many of the boys on The Wrap - Rod Allen. Of course not - and hopefully not - but you get the point. It is always someone's brother, son, friend and husband/ partner. There are boundaries - especially when there is speculation and no proof...just the ruminations of some independent report. There seems a keen determination to fit a square peg into a round hole. The thought of someone - presumably from the Cronulla club - leaking this to the media is deflating. That club needs a makeover.

2. Steve Matai. This bloke needs to meet Jim Comans. He has an appalling record for foul play and his hit on George Burgess should rub him out for an extended period. Ok, not reckless..probably careless (off the ball), but how many more? He also vanished and did not touch the ball after later hitting Sam Burgess with an unpunished shoulder charge (!). He did not cover himself with glory...everytime he got the ball he passed it after that point. He needs to be spelled from the game and Manly need to promote younger more talented players. Send him away, we've had enough.

3. Jamie Lyon. Ran away from Parramatta, Man of Aluminium in the UK, refuses to play tough for NSW Origin and spends every moment on the field whinging and whining. He leads a team who niggle and play dirty when they are not winning. Manly are getting tired and cranky and deserved to be smacked hard on Friday night. Lyon is a hated man unfortunately. Richard Fa'osa is a grub as well. He needs a suspension of length to learn the lesson. Has played at more clubs than Slim Dusty and was the one who escaped significant punsihment for his hit on Ashley Harrison earlier this year.

4. Great to see the NRL pack out Allianz for the ANZAC club game - and Brookvale - and the Melbourne stadium...that CEO Dave Smith has got it all worked out. Never been a better operator.
However, this shoulder charge rule is going to plague the game. Determined by the board of the NRL...and now saving tries cannot involve a shoulder...strange days.

5. It took all of two days before Ryan Harris fell in an injured heap again. Chad Sayers is the man to be selected in his place. Led the Shield as biggest wicket taker and plays hard. From Sth Australia so has had plenty of time to perfect the art of bowling and a lot of other things.

6. Noticed Shane Watson is back bowling and hitting runs in the IPL. Amazing what cash does to someone. By the way, I cannot see that Glenn Maxwell has played any IPL games so far. His $1 million looks like a mirage at this point. Like his Test career.

7. Tom Waterhouse.com. Sounds like Singo might have been stitched up by some mates - or Tom Waterhouse is about to get his Fine Cotton family moment. Tom of course would never lie...he seems well versed in the truth and the way to manoeuvre within its bounds.

More Joyous has been a great performer, but probably like Singo, its best days are past. I'm sure Gai couldn't give a fat rats if he took all his horses. There are plenty more where those came from.

8. Liking the style of Geelong in this year's AFL. But what about the Richmond goal umpire travesty. A video review system? Farcical.

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Wrap - Ashes Dissection (Squad Subject to Completion of Homework)

1. Breathe easy the 16 man Ashes squad announced today has some pluses...no Mitchell Johnson. No Glenn 'The Goose' Maxwell (should he ever have played?). No more 'doorknobs' Xavier Career. No fairweather Steve Smith or the world's best debutant and nothing since, Moises Henriques. All good.

2. Brad Haddin as vice captain...the best news is that Matthew Wade is effectively dumped, but will he stay in the side? Suddenly we could have a team with TWO wicketkeepers, TWO vice captains and FIVE - YES FIVE openers - Warner, Cowan, Hughes, Watson..and now Chris (one Test) Rogers from Victoria via WA. He was absolutely terrible on a seaming deck at Stadium Australia in the T20 so God knows why he has been selected.

In fact I know why..he captained the Sydney Thunder (where Clarke played in name only late season)...another 'mate' looked after by Clarke.

Middle order bats? Only Clarke and Khawaja (if he does his homework)

3. It must be said, that only Khawaja and Ryan Harris are from QLD who won the T20, domestic ODI and made the Shield Final. Lehmann will be in the press soon enough. Hartley? Linn? Not even in the Australia A Team either. How long do you give Ryan Harris before yet another injury?

FIVE from NSW (Warner*, Watson*, Clarke*, Starc*, Haddin*), FOUR from VIC (Rogers*, Siddle, Wade, Pattinson), THREE from TAS (Cowan*, Faulkner, Bird*), TWO from SA (Hughes*, Lyon*) and TWO from QLD (Khawaja*, Harris).

(* = NSW affiliation)

4. We are thin in the batting department and strong in keepers and bowling not so bad. Faulkner is a good selection. A competitor and can bat. Is it bad to say that some of our bowlers are better batsmen than the top order? Faulkner can bat, so can Siddle - back to back fifties last Test and Starc (99)...I'm more worried about Hughes, Cowan and Watson.

5. Australia 'A' - the advance party: Brad Haddin NSW (c), Steve Smith NSW (vc), Ashton Agar (WA), Jackson Bird (TAS), Alex Doolan (TAS), Ryan Harris (QLD), Moises Henriques (NSW), Usman Khawaja (QLD), Nathan Lyon (SA), Nic Maddinson (NSW), James Pattinson (VIC), Chadd Sayers (SA), Peter Siddle (VIC), Jordan Silk (TAS).

The loading of middle order bats here - Doolan, Maddinson and yet another opener in Silk (ex Penrith boy who went to Tassie...sound familiar) is interesting. Agar is a fighter and Chadd Sayers was the leading Shield wicket taker this year. He can play and should have been the bolter in the Ashes squad for mine. He should stay fit with the fragile Starc, Harris, Bird and Pattinson there.

6. Nearly fell over when I read that Nathan Lyon will be playing for NSW this year. Signed today. He knows how to keep that team song duty...be mates with Clarke or perish. What would Michael Hussey think?

More to the point, Steve O'Keefe must have been badly put out by this. He is the one who is missing from these teams. Look for him to move states after relinquishing the NSW relieving captaincy late last season.

7. Did anyone see that Gayle ton over night in the IPL...off 30 balls. Brutal. Ended on 175!!!

8. *Now for homework...How can the whole squad (11/16 only at present) become New South Welshmen or ex New South Welshmen? Discuss.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Wrap - The Meanderers Schemozzle

1. Tonga v Samoa. Drew a bigger crowd at Penrith Park than the Panthers have seen in years. Loved the pre match hype and the hakas. Intense. How many dropped balls, stupid offloads, props doing chips over the top and ridiculous errors can a match have? The "switch off" factor in the Pacific Islander football is a worry, but their physicality, spirit and brutal defence is amazing. Well cut - and big blokes. Ben Roberts is a dud. A hazard in your team with poor hands, silly passes and terrible kicks. On the other hand, gotta love Liki Liki. Popular with the girls.

Not sure how many people saw the end of the show, but the crowd went crazy and invaded the pitch before the ref could end the game. Gotta say that the NRL are to blame for a lot of this. Only one ref, no video ref, poor security numbers and a demented ground announcer pleading hopelessly for order ...amateur hour and no understanding of the islander culture. We had blokes running on and tackling the goalposts...flag bearers screaming on into the in-goal and an old fashioned pitch invasion to end. Super stuff. The best part of this is the prospect of a serious International - Pacific - rugby league competition emerging. Suddenly at the end their International quest is questioned. The ref was gutless. He did not need to end it early, it was not that bad...

The players could not give a rats though...who's going to hurt them? Not one injury in the match - or time off. Extraordinary.

The ANZAC Test on the other hand. Pretty boring and tired. Especially when not on ANZAC day. Can anyone explain why this test is not on ANZAC Day? Go figure. We play a club game instead.

2. The City v Country game is a joke. Hard to promote when ten blokes withdraw and there are more excuses than Eddie Obeid's lawyer. Adam Reynolds should be our half and James Maloney our five eight - he has starch. To not select Ryan Hoffman would be ridiculous. Any eligible Storm player should be an automatic selection.

3. West Sydney Wanderers. Due for a loss - and got one at the worst possible time. Graham Arnold is a class act and should bow out now after cracking a victory. He could lead a nation to international success - sadly it may not be our nation! Huge crowd. No doubt we will get all the maniac fans and poor behaviour on tomorrow's news services - arrests, assaults and a continuation with the fascination in The World Game with FIRE! What is it? Light a flare? Burn a seat, a grandstand, a bus, a car?

4. Must say, that the Masters golf finish was very exciting. Better that Adam Scott - he of the foreign accent - won it. Legend. Put Adam Scott with Cadel Evans in our collective lifetimes as a legend in sport (with Lockett, Warnie, Federer, Nadal, Woods, Black Caviar, Brad Thorne and the Aussie darts player with the ponytail). Readers of The Wrap will note he was tipped here last Sunday. Enjoy your cash!

5. AFL. A defining week. Hawthorn, Collingwood and Essendon stepped up (Swans, St Kilda, Freo and Richmond were relegated to where they deserve). Those supplements are kicking in nicely for the Bombers. SHHHHHHHHH don't mention it, Demetriou might hear the truth. Ten strikes and you're gone.

6. Shane Watson. This guy does not get it. He has a zillion injuries and loyal selectors go back to select him repeatedly. Pulling up lame, breaking down....on it goes. He plays IPL ($$$ of course) instead. He changes states - TAS, QLD, NSW- at will. He is selected in the Australian team and tells everyone he can't bowl/ won't bowl anymore. He is feted and sucked up to with TWO AB medals. He develops arrogance and a perception of invincibility - however poor his lone two Test centuries look.

He doesn't do his homework and is sacked. He throws a tantrum and comes home to be with his wife and kid. He annoys coaches and captains alike. Sacked? No...he is then given the Australian captaincy!! Now he does not want to be vice captain? And everything is fine with Michael Clarke? He is a selfish prize tool. He is clearly on notice to perform or perish. He needs to feel that empty feeling that galvanised cricketers like the Waughs and Hayden over the years - being dumped, axed, sacked and deposed all in one. He has had a fairytail ride. Fairies believe in fairytails. He is 32. The twilight is upon him.

7. Did I miss something with the Folau try for the Tahs...a sensational try? Looked like he caught a bomb and strolled over for mine. A great attacking win by the Tahs. Maybe any try in rugby is sensational. Like the Brumbies and Reds. Brian Smith has not gotten one headline yet as part of the Brumbies defensive coaching staff...maybe around GF time when his entrenched hoodoo strikes?

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Wrap - Caviar For Some

1. Parramatta are just laughable. Their lack of focus and inability to persevere under pressure is staggering. They look better without Cheyse Blair and Ken Sio could just be a star one day. (Maybe they therefore won't re-sign the most injury prone player in world sport - Willie Tonga). However far too many lazy players - led unfortunately by their Pacific Islander boys - Moi Moi, Roberts, Paulo and the league's most over rated player - Jarryd Hayne. They all actually look unfit. He saunters and stuffs around, proving to be an easy target for opposing defences. Jacob Loko is big, but he is not smart enough to succeed long term.

Ricky Stuart coached sides have always had terrible discipline. He got smashed in the penalty count and deserved it. He loves to put pressure on post game, but refs forget when they see his tactics. He can blame the refs but they need to watch Melbourne Storm and how they do it. Niggle but no brains. Parramatta's penalties they give are abomnable. Lussick is a liability.

2. Just on Tonga, there are some blokes who get paid a lot of money to be injured. A Club CEO pleaser.

The annual City-Country farce gets underway this week. The pull outs and the lies begin tomorrow morning as players try everything to keep their club coaches happy and pass up the jersies at that level.

3. The Wanderers continue to pack Parra Stadium and mesemerise the opposition. I wonder if anyone at the Parramatta club has half a brain to find out how they do it and try to mirror their success? Don't be stupid, as if.

4. A-League Mariners v Wanderers. Graham Arnold has steered them to Grand Finals before (four for the club) and they will be raging favourites against the Hersey-less Wanderers. Arnold is a class act and a winner. A GUUUUS Hiddinck prodigy.

Just on Postocoglou, I am staggered at his post match rudeness, childishness and he deserved to lose. He grunts through press conferences and hands out lectures to whoever will listen. Grow up you embarrassing fool!

5. I note that Mark Webber's GP car has had a wheel fall off mid race at the Chinese GP. There seems to be a pattern here. Maybe a metaphor for his GP career? What next? His team have some answers to provide there. Bluey forgot the wheelnuts. Use a Sidchrome..youcannahand amanagrander. Joke.

6. The Masters. Writing this we hear all the hype about Aussies placed well to win for the first time ever, Aussies breaking ducks, drought ender, yada yada. Scott is our only chance. Jason Day went to water on 17 and 18 late in the third round and it bodes poorly. The pressure at that tournament is like no other world sporting event.

7. Black Caviar. What an awesome record 25-0. A phenomenal horse. Its offspring will bring $10 million a pop. Hopefully the farewell tour for the horse continues into Brisbane.

8. Hawthorn look strong. Port are reviving themselves. Swans better. Richmond looking OK. But what about Melbourne? They may need to fold and go to Tassie.

9. How about Australian Rugby? Reds, Brumbies win and the Force beat the Crusaders...what? The Waratahs will level this all out no doubt.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

The Wrap - Invers On The Outers

1. Fancy being Cronulla? No sponsor on the jersey, no ground sponsor, home ground looks like a joke, big cost recruits (Wade Graham, Beau Ryan, Luke Lewis, Todd Carney, Flash Michael Gordon...and on it goes) underperforming, amateurish club leadership, ASADA all over them, peptides under every cabinet in the club - and a loss to Parramatta. A loss to Parramatta? Parramatta now have more wins than the Bulldogs.

2. Ricky Stuart's comments about there being 'plenty more 50 point beatings ahead'. Is this his insurance for his own job at Parramatta? Fancy saying that and then telling everyone that this week he focused on one on one/ individual accountability...what's been happening in the other weeks? can't imagine his employer would be thrilled hearing this.

3.  Saints are rebounding nicely, scrapping and winning tight games...Steve Price stays alive with that. Souths look like they may be made of sterner stuff than most and the Panthers are in serious trouble. The rebuilding is like that that could befall the decendants of North Korea's leaders if they don't pull their heads in. Liking the Roosters. Brutal defence (at least for half a game v Canberra) - a bit like Manly.

4. Cricket. What about the Invers secret 30 man squad for the Champions Trophy that Australia have insisted stays on the QT? Too afraid to see the Australian public's reaction to more dumb arsed decisions and bone brained poor judgements. Fancy only getting 5 batsmen in the contract list? Why the hell do you need contracts anyhow? Not as though they will rush off and play for Sri Lanka! And worse...who will want them?

5. Troubled to see the GWS flounder in the third quarter again after leading. Inexperienced yes, but lacking fitness and application. Lots to learn. Too many young ones for mine.

Love the poise of Collingwood under pressure. they always seem to produce. Favourites this year although the Dockers have a lot to give. Swans not sharp enough yet.

6. Rugby. Is there a more understated competition for the amount of money spent on the game? Blokes on big contracts in what remains an amateur sport in so many ways. Mainstream viewers would not know or care what happens in Super Rugby. Bring back half time and oranges on the field for mine. That's where the game is at. Sad.

7. Brisbane Roar - A League. Will take some beating. Coming good at the right time. A week off for the Sydney Wanderers is ominous. It could all fold quickly for them if they are not on the ball.

8.  Uzbekistan. Beaten by Tomic in Davis Cup. A struggle. There was a time when tennis players thought Uzbekistan was a place that may have made sweatbands. Nice to see Tomic do something for the country and not himself. Maybe he's growing up. His world ranking is in free fall however.

9. Masters Golf next week. Tiger to win. He will be back bigger than ever. Poised and ready to pounce.

Monday, April 1, 2013

The Wrap - Bring Me A Stretcher for Frank Arok

1. Parramatta. They are getting worse - as predicted. Bluffed in Round One, but simply have too many lazy footballers. They are well refined with their whinging, but their defence needs as much work. Ricky Stuart is surely kidding if that pattern of attack is the best they can do all week. He seems to have put up the white flag already. He is gearing their attack to harm minimisation and restricting any flair. 0-50 in a NRL match is a disgrace. They will be lucky to win six games this year and are favourites for the spoon.

The equivalent is you continually making crooked photocopies all week, losing your work keys, parking across the bosses car spot, farting in the office when an interview is about to commence, leaving your important file on the bus and walking around the office all day with your fly undone. You would be at 0-50 too.

2. Sandow. For all his brilliance, he is an absolute liability in defence. Sadly, too small and misses more than a fat lady waddling with the shopping to a bus stop. Hayne is also getting worse. He parades across the tryline deliberately late and like a small time school prefect afterwards...everyone else is to blame. Maybe it is all that cash in his pockets which is slowing him down. How long before Hayne is suspended?

Reynolds for Souths needs to be our Origin halfback. The love affair with Mitchell Pearce needs to end. Reynolds was superb. Merritt (Max and the Meteors) should be on one wing too. He is all class - and great under the high ball and in defence.

3. Conversely, Souths have skill. They have slowly assembled a champion team. Imported brilliantly from the UK (How good are the Burgess boys?) and have big mobile blokes and strict discipline in their club.

4. Inu should be rubbed out for eight weeks. How he was not sent off for that tackle on Inglis (arguably the biggest and best player in the NRL) is beyond me. He had two efforts between the legs. Grub act.

5. Michael Clarke rushed to hospital after a stomach upset. No suprise, he would have the shits and be sick to the core after that performance in India. I have a sneaking suspicion, Cricket Australia will sit on the whole management/ team farce and make zero changes. Pathetic.

6. Went out to the Oman v Australia Soccer International. What an absolute disgrace. How they will attract a crowd to this game in Australia is beyond me. We all want soccer to succeed, but how...Omani players fall over - the stretcher comes out - player taken off - then LAZARUS ARISE! They run back onto the field. I have three rule changes to make the game better. Listen up Mr Blatter:

a. Stretcher required? Player does not return to the field.
b. Kick the ball out on the full - opponent's ball from wher eit was kicked.
c. Referee - five metre radius - or a penalty in front is awarded.

Some fair dinkum Frank Arok genius there. By the way, Frank Arok always looked like he had sickle cell anemia when he was coach...he presented some awards at half time and looked like they had opened a coffin to bring him in.

7. Saw GWS v Swans at ANZ the other night and have attached a photo that no one will ever believe (below). GWS in front in the second quarter. The predictions of them eventually becoming a powerhouse in a few years may actually be on the money. Disappointed in the Swans obsession with trying to elbow, shoulder and disrupt younger GWS players. They needed to focus on their own game as they were pretty ordinary really.

 
8. How Vettel can look at Webber is beyond me. He may have to buy one for the back patio instead! BOOM!
 
9. Wanderers have a week off. Not good for them. Will struggle to win the A league. Still like the Victory.
 
10. Tahs limp to a win and we get the reverse...the other great excuse maker - Foley - rolling out his usual but for the Force this time. He is a joke. Line up behind the Rebels' coach...he has to go surely. That franchise is the worst in Australia just in front of the Sydney Thunder.